If you follow me on Instagram, you might know that I’ve been suffering a bit from… God knows what. Postpartum anxiety? Postpartum rage? Homesickness combined with my parents going back to Ireland after six weeks in the US? State-of-the-world-related panic?! WHO KNOWS.
It’s affecting a lot of aspects of my life, not least of which my ability to sit down and string sentences together.
So I’m sorry. I’m taking a little break. I’ll be back as soon as I can (hopefully next week!), but in the meantime I would love to chat to you all about whatever it is you want to chat about.
Have you been watching anything great lately? Have you listened to any thrilling podcasts?
Do you love / hate Beyoncé’s new album? (Do you care?)
WHAT do we think about the Wagatha Christie verdict?
I am here for any and all chats – anything gossip- or scandal-adjacent would also be very welcome. Please, distract me from my own racing thoughts xo
P.S. Thank you all for supporting me and reading my writing and being patient and lovely and understanding, always. This newsletter allows me to be what I’ve always wanted to be – a writer – and also has a side effect of allowing me to be home cuddling my baby at a time when cuddles are absolutely essential. Big love.
You don't need to apologise for taking time when you need to! Your mental health ( or people's mental health on general!) Is the key priority in life so you need to do whatever it takes to safeguard that. Burning out serves nobody, least of all yourself and your lovely family. Have all the baby cuddles, all the mugs of tae, all the chocolate and whatever else it takes to make you feel 'ok'.
I’ve just had a little breakdown and listened to Winnie the Pooh on audiobook. It helped a little but so did all the delicious chocolate my boyfriend just bought home.
But my favourite thing to do to distract myself is some good scary stories. So here you go,a little story from my last night duty (I’m a nurse).
Around 2am a moving sensor alarm goes off. It’s a laser beam that covers the floor so when a patient puts their feet out of bed it triggers the alarm. I race down to the room so that they don’t fall. They are still cuddled up in bed, no signs that they have tried to get out. To turn off the alarm I have to reach over the head of their bed and as I do I say goodnight again and tell them I’m right outside the door if they need me. They take my fecking hand and ask “who is that man behind you?” But I’m like “oh it’s just me and you here nobody else, don’t worry” ( I do a quick spin around) they just reply “why is he just standing there looking at me?”
I’ve got a few more stories from where I work so I quickly pop out and tell the other staff that they can check on the patient the next time because that was a little freaky. I’m half messing. I go to sit down at the nurses station and carry on with paperwork. Then I hear another patient ROARING I can’t make out what they are saying but I’m racing into the room because they are going to wake everyone in the unit. The room is dark and my eyes are adjusting as I make my way to the bed. The patient spots me and at the same time I’ve clicked that they are shouting “get him out!”. They turn to me and say “get him out! get him out!” So I’m going “nobody is here it’s ok” but they point to the window and say “there is a man in here, I saw his face in the window, tell him to get out”. They wont listen to me so I decide just to go along with it!? I loudly say “come on mister, you can’t be in here” and as I turn towards the door it slams right in front of me. These are big fire proof doors that close slowly unless the fire alarm is triggered.
Nothing more happened that night. I just got straight out of the room. I’ve told my ghost stories to my mum and she often suggests asking the ghosts if they need help but I’m not that brave!
I suffered from something similar when both my boys were about 8 months old - coincidentally the period was always marked by me coming back to Dublin from Brazil where I would have spent 2 months of my maternity leave. Luckily the second time around I knew it wasn't "normal" to feel like I did (all the rage!!) and I reached out to my GP. Hope you'll feel a bit more like yourself soon <3
I watched the new Persuasion movie on netflix last night and I'm still unsure what to think of it but it kept me distracted for nearly 2 hours. That was my favourite Jane Austen book so I kept watching it even though I found some bits of it very very cringey!
Perfect distraction activity - when you feel up to it 💕 can you & Beatrice do the enneagram test, if you haven’t already - then do a podcast on your types and how they “work” together?
Don’t worry Rosemary. Everyone needs a break from time to time. I’m watching Under the Banner of Heaven. I hadn’t read the book so it’s my first time hearing the story. Mad. Religion has a lot to answer for. Reading Hide and Seek by Andrea Mara if you have any time to read with a baby! It’s really good. Mind yourself. ❤️
Station Eleven on Hulu is great, captivating enough without requiring intense concentration. I also find ordering some overpriced cadburys, taytos, rock shandy etc online helps soothe the homesickness (closest brick and mortar to me that sells them is 5! hours away).
You don't need to apologise for taking time when you need to! Your mental health ( or people's mental health on general!) Is the key priority in life so you need to do whatever it takes to safeguard that. Burning out serves nobody, least of all yourself and your lovely family. Have all the baby cuddles, all the mugs of tae, all the chocolate and whatever else it takes to make you feel 'ok'.
I’ve just had a little breakdown and listened to Winnie the Pooh on audiobook. It helped a little but so did all the delicious chocolate my boyfriend just bought home.
But my favourite thing to do to distract myself is some good scary stories. So here you go,a little story from my last night duty (I’m a nurse).
Around 2am a moving sensor alarm goes off. It’s a laser beam that covers the floor so when a patient puts their feet out of bed it triggers the alarm. I race down to the room so that they don’t fall. They are still cuddled up in bed, no signs that they have tried to get out. To turn off the alarm I have to reach over the head of their bed and as I do I say goodnight again and tell them I’m right outside the door if they need me. They take my fecking hand and ask “who is that man behind you?” But I’m like “oh it’s just me and you here nobody else, don’t worry” ( I do a quick spin around) they just reply “why is he just standing there looking at me?”
I’ve got a few more stories from where I work so I quickly pop out and tell the other staff that they can check on the patient the next time because that was a little freaky. I’m half messing. I go to sit down at the nurses station and carry on with paperwork. Then I hear another patient ROARING I can’t make out what they are saying but I’m racing into the room because they are going to wake everyone in the unit. The room is dark and my eyes are adjusting as I make my way to the bed. The patient spots me and at the same time I’ve clicked that they are shouting “get him out!”. They turn to me and say “get him out! get him out!” So I’m going “nobody is here it’s ok” but they point to the window and say “there is a man in here, I saw his face in the window, tell him to get out”. They wont listen to me so I decide just to go along with it!? I loudly say “come on mister, you can’t be in here” and as I turn towards the door it slams right in front of me. These are big fire proof doors that close slowly unless the fire alarm is triggered.
Nothing more happened that night. I just got straight out of the room. I’ve told my ghost stories to my mum and she often suggests asking the ghosts if they need help but I’m not that brave!
I suffered from something similar when both my boys were about 8 months old - coincidentally the period was always marked by me coming back to Dublin from Brazil where I would have spent 2 months of my maternity leave. Luckily the second time around I knew it wasn't "normal" to feel like I did (all the rage!!) and I reached out to my GP. Hope you'll feel a bit more like yourself soon <3
I watched the new Persuasion movie on netflix last night and I'm still unsure what to think of it but it kept me distracted for nearly 2 hours. That was my favourite Jane Austen book so I kept watching it even though I found some bits of it very very cringey!
Perfect distraction activity - when you feel up to it 💕 can you & Beatrice do the enneagram test, if you haven’t already - then do a podcast on your types and how they “work” together?
Take care
Don’t worry Rosemary. Everyone needs a break from time to time. I’m watching Under the Banner of Heaven. I hadn’t read the book so it’s my first time hearing the story. Mad. Religion has a lot to answer for. Reading Hide and Seek by Andrea Mara if you have any time to read with a baby! It’s really good. Mind yourself. ❤️
Station Eleven on Hulu is great, captivating enough without requiring intense concentration. I also find ordering some overpriced cadburys, taytos, rock shandy etc online helps soothe the homesickness (closest brick and mortar to me that sells them is 5! hours away).